Muted Loz
by Sylver Diadem
Summary: Uh... I'm Francis... acrobat and... mute... My sister and I came to Alternia to meet her pen pal and friends... But we've both found... love... (Horrible at summaries, sorry dudes. But check it out if ya want.) KurlozXOC, EridanXOC
1. Chapter 1

_**Fuck this. Owns nothing. Fucking enjoy.**_

* * *

I sigh as I follow my little sister of fifteen through the crowded train station. Her pen pal from Alternia, Feferi I think it was, had asked us to come spend a Sweep with her and her family. Now we're just looking for them in this crowded as fuck place.

Someone bumps into me and I fall. "Watch it, human." an Alternian male hisses as he straightens his coat before continuing on his way. I hold up my right fist, my left hand resting in the crook of my right elbow, effectively flipping him off. Not like he'd know even if he'd seen it.

"Ceili!" We both turn to see a girl in a black tank with a bright blue and green skirt waving at us. Her tiara immediately makes her royalty, and the Pieces sign on her tank seals the deal. _Fuck._ Why royalty? Why me?

"Feferi!" My sister squeals and runs over to hug the Alternian girl. I see that she's not alone. At least a dozen others stand with her, looking us over with unreadable expressions. I tug nervously at the bottom hem of my black cashmere sweater.

"Feferi, this is my sister." Ceili gestures to me. "Hi, Francis. It's nice to meet you!" Feferi holds out her hand for me to shake. I take it with a polite smile, nodding my head to her once in greeting.

"These are my friends!" Feferi gestures to the group behind her. Some give small smiles, others look at the new humans curiously.

"Why don't we all go back to KK'th hive!" One male, wearing blue and red glasses and a yellow Gemini symbol on his black t-shirt, suggests. Everyone voices their agreement accept a guy in a black sweater with a Cancer symbol on the front, who says, "Fuck no. Why the fuck do we have to go to my hive every gog damned time you bulge suckers wanna celebrate?! Why don't we all go over to your meaningless, wriggler-brained, architecturally mundane and fucked up hive, Captor?" Wow, this must be Karkat... He's got some issues, huh?

"We can all up and motherfucking go to my hive." The tallest of the group offers with a lazy smile. His face is painted white with clown make-up and I fight back a blush, remembering my job back on Earth as a carny.

"Sure, Gamzee! Let's go!" Feferi leads the way, arm linked with Ceili's. I keep near the back of the large group, carrying both me and my younger sister's duffles, and my classical string bass in it's gig bag on my back. I let a small smile creep onto my face. Ceili didn't make friends often, so I'm letting her live this to the fullest.

"Need some help?" I look up at a girl with a red skirt. She holds out her hand for one of the duffles. I shake my head, giving a small _'I'm okay'_ smile. She frowns briefly before taking one of the duffles anyway. I blush, unsure as to how to thank her. Would she understand if I tried?

The walk isn't long, and we are at a large, ominous fortress-like home. They file in behind Gamzee, who leads them into a den with game stations and four large-ass flat screens. The nice Alternian girl sets the duffle down by the entrance, and I set down my duffle and bass. "Let's play games!" Feferi decides happily. She turns on the Wii, and hands one remote to Ceili and one to a female Alternian with a light blue Scorpio symbol on her black shirt. "We're divided into teams for Wii Fit!" she declares happily, the rest nodding and smiling in excitement... Except Karkat, of course.

I back away from the den, hoping they forget I'm here. This is Ceili's thing, not mine. I don't want to interfere with her bonding with her friends, so I slip away, looking for a bathroom.

After five minutes, I deem myself completely lost. I frown, not even hearing the (it was when I could hear it) loud ass laughter of Ceili and the others. Hmmm... I press on a simple-looking door, thinking it to finally be the bathroom I've been looking for.

It's not. It's like I've stepped into a ring-top circus tent. The acrobat's poles stand tall, the net secure beneath the tightrope... my favorite act. I'm an acrobat; tightrope, swings, rings, sashes, you name it. I also do tricks atop animals, when I feel like it. But right now, that tightrope is calling me... and I can't help but move to climb up to it...

* * *

 **Ceili's POV**

"Karkat, can you help me? I'm looking for Franny." I ask the Cancer. "Why the fuck do I have to? What in nook-sniffing hell happened?" he growls, irritated.

"I think she's gone off by herself. You know this place pretty well, right?" I inquire hopefully.

"Like hell I'm gonna get fucking lost in this hellhole! There're two other fucking highbloods in this hive, an' I'm don't wanna fucking meet those bulge-lickers." he snarls lowly. My blood boils, and I growl myself. "You asshole! That's even more reason to find her before they do! If she screams, you wouldn't be able to hear her!" With that, I grab Gamzee's hand and storm off. Thankfully, the rest follow us.

"Ack!" I collide with something, taking Gamzee down with me with an indignant, "Honk!" We scramble back up and there's a taller, scarier version of Gamzee looking down at us. His face is painted like a skeleton. "Yo, Kurbro! Kay-Sis's big Sis all up and went motherfucking missing in our motherfuckin' hive. Help a sister out?" Gamzee grins easily at the silent giant. Fuck.

He nods, eyes beginning to glaze slightly as he... does something. My anxiety is eating away at me. The suddenly, he comes back to himself. _'We have to hurry. She's in the Court of Miracles in the Dark Carnival. And she's losing herself quickly.'_ A deep, male voice speaks quickly in my head before he grabs my free arm, the other's hand still hold Gamzee, and towing us away at an even faster pace than I was originally going. Fuck, why did this sound like a bad thing?

* * *

 **Francis' POV**

I grin wildly as I whirl on the tightrope, spinning, jumping, and juggling- yes _juggling!_ Juggling flaming swords. I'm not even in the jeans and tee I arrived in. By the time I reached the rope, I was in a black, long-sleeved leotard with indigo swirls all over it. My feet are wrapped in black ace bandages, to help with balance and running and... other things...

I grin, feeling as if I have an audience. But that's absurd. No one was here when I came in... I flip into a one-handed stand on the tightrope, my feet juggling the swords now.

A door bangs open, followed by Ceili screaming, "Francis!" And it's as if I'm being broken from a trance. But whatever it is that has my mind bound, it's still in control. I flip and hang upside down by my knees hooked over the wire. I bend my back to look up at them, holding a single finger to my smiling lips in a _'shh'_ gesture, and she gasps in shock and horror. Why, I don't really know or care. Silly little Ceili. She should join me here. It's fucking miraculous, and magical, and exactly what I've been searching for my whole life. "Francis, please, get down!" Ceili implores.

"Let the motherfucker finish her performance." A new voice- a low bass that sends shivers up my spine- reverberates through the room. I'm then aware of the onlookers in the room. I have an audience.

I throw my head back and flip myself up and am quickly standing on the rope once more. The swords are gone, in neat lines on either side of the net under me. I do a cartwheel before leaping into a ballerina's leap. I land delicately, spinning effortlessly across the rope to the small landing board. I turn to face the rope again and bow. The room bursts into honks and applause. The feelings of weightlessness and immortality leave me, and I resume control of my body once more. I feel a bit dizzy, but stay standing. There are a lot of large trolls on various shades of purple looking up at me. Ceili and her friends are watching in horror. My clothes... these aren't mine. Shit, what happened to me?

I quickly climb down the ladder and Ceili runs to me. I hug her, trembling at the realization that I was possessed. _'But possessed by what?'_

"That was a motherfuckin' miraculous show." A voice behind me rumbles. I turn to see a gigantic, terrifying version of Gamzee looming over us. Nervously, I bow my head in thanks of his praise. Eridan comes up to gently tug Ceili into his (*cough* protective *cough*) hold. "Ya up and motherfuckin' perform, motherfucker?" he asks me in a growl. I hesitate before nodding despite the skeleton guy and Ceili shaking their heads no. The tall man gives me what should have been a terrifying grin, but thanks to almost every scary movie ever made, it was pretty normal. "Glad ta hear. Keep close by; might up and need you some motherfucking time soon." With that, he leaves with the group of purple Alternians, all who look at me with a strange mixture of curiosity and discontent before following their leader out. I turn to Ceili. _"Is he like the Ring Master of this circus?"_ I sign curiously.

 _"You could say that."_ the skeleton man answers for her. I look at him inquisitively. _"And who are you?"_ I sign to him. _"Name's Kurloz. You must be Francis?"_ I nod. _"Are you mute too?"_ I ask a bit hesitantly. Now it's his turn to nod. _"Yes, but by choice. I made a vow never to speak again."_ he explains.

"Holy bitchtits, you can sign?!" Gamzee cries, looking at me with wonder. I give a small, sad smile and nod. "Franny's mute, like Kurloz. Only she was born that way." Ceili explains to everyone. I nod my confirmation when they look to me.

"And you can walk a tightrope? Or was that the voodoos?" Gamzee asks, totally looking at me as if I were sent by a deity. I nod and look to Ceili. "Yeah, Sis works at the local circus. Our uncle runs it. She's an acrobatic." she answers in detail.

"Um... why don't we go back to the den?" Tavros suggests quietly. Everyone immediately agrees and we all begin to head back the way I suppose we came.

I gently tap Kurloz's elbow, and he looks at me questioningly. _"I... wanted to ask what happened back there? What happened to me?"_ I sign, looking at him imploringly. He seems a little reluctant to tell me. **"It was the Dark Carnival."** A deep, oh so fucking sexy voice in my mind explains. My eyes widen as I look at him. _"Is that you I hear?"_ I ask quickly as we turn another corner. He nods. **"Yes. Don't be alarmed. This is what we subjugglators call 'chucklevoodoos'."** I smile at the name. **"But as I was saying, you had entered the Court of Miracles, the heart of our Dark Carnival. The Carnival likes performers like you, although it's never taken a liking to a human before."** I blush and feel sheepish. We're back at the den, but Kurloz and I keep walking.

 _"That makes sense. Ceili and I are eighth generation carnies. It's in our blood and bones."_ I explain in sign language. Kurloz nods, looking kinda thoughtful. **"Well, I can only assume the Dark Carnival wants you. That means you are special to the Mirthful Messiahs."** I give a confused face. _"Do you know anything of Alternian culture?"_ he signs now. I shake my head. _"Not really interested. But I'd like to hear more about these Mirthful Messiahs."_ I answer as I sit at a small dining table in a large kitchen while Kurloz rummages through the fridge- thermal hull, if I remember Ceili's words correctly. Kurloz gives a stitch-y smile when he comes over with a can of some Alternian-brand soda and a plate of... cookie? _"Thank you."_ I sign with a slight blush.

So this is where we spend the next... I don't know how long honestly. I'm so caught up in learning that I don't see the sun begin to come up. _"We should get you back to the others. It's almost time to sleep."_ Kurloz signs. I nod and follow him back to the den where Ceili and her friends are all out cold. I give a grin, and a silent chuckle. Kurloz, however, gives his own baritone chuckle and my heart does this little fluttering thing, like when I try something new for the first time and I love it. But nonetheless, I help him get all the kids onto beanbags or couches and cover them completely with blankets after Kurloz puts some weird green slime over the Alternian kids' eyelids. Then he stops, looking a little helpless. **"I don't want to leave you here alone. But I'm not exactly sure you could survive in a recuperacoon."** I raise one eyebrow at the fact that he had to voodoo me or whatever to get the last word across, but shake my head. _"No, it's fine. Go sleep. I know you're nocturnal. I'll stay here in case one of them wakes up."_ He frowns and shakes his head before signing, _"No. You could be lured back into the Carnival. We barely got to you in time, and if you were left alone for long, no one knows what would happen. All the others were Alternian, and they didn't leave with their sanity."_ At this, it's my turn to frown. _"I'm sorry if I'm worrying you. But you don't have to do anything uncomfortable for my sake. It's my fault that happened to me."_ I try to assure him and his brows furrow, the frown making his stitches stretch a bit and I fight a wince at how uncomfortable it must feel.

He disappears and reappears five minutes later with a thick, soft comforter and a small jar of that same green slime he put on the kids. He lays out the comforter and lays on it, gesturing for me to lay beside him. I flush deeply, but do as he instructs. He folds the comforter in half to cover us. He closes his eyes and puts some of the slime on his eyelids before setting aside the jar, pulling me flush against him in the spooning position, and letting out a content sigh. I force myself to relax and close my own eyes. I drift to sleep to Kurloz singing softly in my mind,

 **"Gotta secret,**  
 **Can you keep it?**  
 **Swear this one you'll save.**  
 **Better lock it**  
 **In your pocket,**  
 **Takin' this one to the grave.**  
 **If I show you,**  
 **Then I know you**  
 **Won't tell what I said.**  
 **'Cause two can keep a secret**  
 **If one of them is dead..."**

* * *

A.N. So, yeah, tell me whatcha think... *sigh*


	2. Chapter 2

**No OwNs! FuCkIn' EnJoY! :o)**

* * *

The next day (night?), Kurloz insisted that I meet his friends, trolls who are my age. Reluctantly, I agreed, mainly because he was the one taking me there.

We arrive at a quaint little ice cream parlor. There are about a dozen trolls sitting in a giant booth in the corner, looking like the older doppelgangers of Ceili's friends. Oh shit.

"Kurloz!" A girl in a green shirt with a pleated black skirt bounces over. She has cat-like features, including cat-ear-shaped horns and a blue tail...? "Is this the friend you were telling me about?" she signs, looking at me curiously as Kurloz nods. "Hi there! I'm Meulin! You must be Francis?" she signs with ease. I nod. "It's nice to meet you." I sign back shyly.

"Kurloz! Meulin! Get the human over here so we can see her better!" An older, cooler version of Eridan calls. Meulin grabs my hand and yanks me to the table. I look back at Kurloz with a 'please-don't-leave-me-with-these-people' look. He gives an assuring smile as he follows behind me.

I'm squished between Meulin and Kurloz in the booth, looking at the others as they look at me. I sign, _"Hello."_ shyly.

"What's you're name?" the older Tavros inquires politely. _"Francis."_ I sign slowly for them. "Is she deaf or mute?" the older Feferi asks, sniffing disdainfully. **"Mute. She was hatched that way. And her name is Francis."** Kurloz's voice echoes through my mind and I see several others shiver. He must be doing a mass-projection. Most of them nod in sympathy and/or understanding. "So you'll be translating for her, Loz?" older Eridan inquires casually, giving me a wink. A soft growl comes to my head. **"Yes."** he answers a bit harshly, and the Aquarius fights back a flinch.

"So why'd you decide to visit our lovely planet of Alternia, Francis?" older Tavros inquires casually, elbow on the table and his chin resting in his hand. The other holds his ice cream. I begin to sign, Kurloz translating to everyone else. **"She says: My sister is pen pals with Feferi Peixes, who invited us to stay here for a Sweep."** I can hear Kurloz too, which I'm thankful for. **"In fact, I met her yesterday when they all came over to our hive to play games."** he elaborates. The older Feferi groans. "So you're one of the humans I have to put up with? Glub..."

"So you've met our descendants?" the dark green girl inquires. I nod my head and sign. **"She says you remind her of one, Porrim. One who helped her carry the bags."** Kurloz thinks to everyone. I nod my confirmation with a small smile. "That must have been Kanaya. Always so helpful." Porrim explains. I smile a little wider and nod again.

"Can I get the Highblood anything?" a pretty lady with horns with little flags like single sixteenth notes inquires politely.

 **"Is there anything you want, Francis?"** Kurloz asks me gently. I think about it. _"Mint and chocolate chip smoothie?"_ I sign, feeling just a tad bit embarrassed. "He'll have a chocolate deathtrap sundae and a mint and chocolate chip smoothie, Kitten." Aquarius answers her in a slight purr, winking at her. Is this guy a player or something? The waitress give a dark, ruby red blush before nodding and hurrying away. Such a pretty color...

"Cronus, you shouldn't play with the lowbloods like that." A taller Karkat in a red turtleneck frowns in disapproval. "It could be highly triggering to others around you, or even the poor girl you're coming on to. The fact that you have yet to take into consideration how others feel is disappointing to people like me. It's childish and inconsiderate. What if you triggered Francis?" Red Karkat turns to me. "I'm terribly sorry for Cronus's behavior. I hope it wasn't too triggering to see him blatantly flirting with the waitress. I've told him time and time again to think before he speaks, but I'm sure he's not listening to my advice. Please don't be too mad with him, he's still learning." This gets an indignant, "Hey!" from the one named Cronus, but nothing else. I nod once and sign to the Red Karkat, Kurloz translating, **"It's cool. She was just wondering what kind of people you are... And your names."**

"Where are our _manners!"_ the red Karkat gasps, thumping himself lightly on the head. "I'm Kankri, Kankri Vantas; Karkat's dancestor." he smiles politely. I incline my head to him as mannerisms dictate.

So we go through everyone, and I force myself to remember their names. We get our ice cream almost right after that, and not five minutes later, another purple blood enters and heads straight for us. "Highblood, your Ancestor requires you and the human miracle's presence." she speaks respectfully. Human miracle? Is that me? Kurloz frowns, but nods nonetheless. I pout, wanting to stay here and get to know my new friends better. Kurloz gives his ice cream to Mituna, and I follow him out with my smoothie in my hand.

* * *

"Motherfucking finally! Been waiting for-motherfuckin'-ever for you motherfuckers." GHB grumbles. Him and Kurloz seem to exchange something through voodoos I guess, before GHB chuckles. He turns his indigo eyes to me. "I want to see you on the rope again, little motherfuckin' miracle. I've consulted the Messiahs, and they want you to perform for the entirety of the motherfuckin' highblood community." Oh fuck. _Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuck!_ How was I suppose to explain this to my sister? All I wanted was a nice, quiet vacation, and now I'm working on my break? **FUCK MY LIFE!**

I bow my head, calming my anger before they can even fathom that I might be angry or unwilling. Because yes, I'm angry, and FUCK YES, I'M UNWILLING. But they... could kill me if they wanted... so, I really don't have much of a choice.

I'm led away by a female Subjugglator (Subjugglette?) to a room where there is a wide variety of acrobatic suits of blacks and dark purples. I skim through them until I come to one that... seems to call me. It's a basic, strap leotard- indigo. It shimmers different shades of purple and dark blue in the lights, and I love it. I change into it quickly, and wrap my feet and ankles in black ace bandages that I find in a seemingly ignored drawer, not even looking at the flats they had wanted me to wear. Fuck that; nope. I brush my boy-short hair absently, and look at a simple purple jar. My senses tell me to open it, and I do. Inside is... white face paint. I frown, but dip my fingers in it nonetheless. _'Might as well blend in.'_ I rationalize. I smear and dab here and there, letting it dry (quick-drying stuff, woohoo!) and reaching for a blue one full of black. I put it around my eyes and start to swirl and design. When I finish, I look like one of the sugar skulls from Dias de Los Meurtos- swirls and flowers and all. Perfect. This is stupid. **Fuck.**

The door opens to reveal a different Subjugglette. She does a quick double-take at my changed appearance, but quickly schools herself. "Will you be needing anything for your performance, Miracle?" Miracle? Is that my name? It doesn't sound like it, but... it has a certain ring to it, doesn't it? I nod, and she leads me to another room full of items used for various acts. I slink in, snooping through this and that. I finally pick a beautiful rapier that's actually a coiling, foil fake for swallowing. I also grab a handful of small throwing knives on my way out.

The center top is dark, but I can feel the presence of many Alternians waiting in the stands.

A single light spills of GHB. I ignore it and quickly and quietly scale the pole tot he tightrope. He seems to glare at everyone before raising his club and I stick the sword in my mouth. He club strikes the arm of his throne and the music begins, lights whirling and flashing crazily, but never landing on me until the lyrics start, showing me in a careful handstand.

 _ **Now's the time, get in line,**_  
 _ **Don't be afraid tonight**_  
 _ **We're gonna take you high, before you realize**_  
 _ **'Round and 'round you'll go, up and down, never slow**_  
 _ **Feel the excitement grow, oh**_  
 _ **This is where you let go!**_

I turn my legs this way and that in pretty designs before carefully flipping to stand on my feet. Being double-jointed makes me a fluid, flexible freak- or the FFF, as my fellow carnies call it. I begin to twirl madly all across the rope as the chorus begins.

 _ **Hands high like a roller coaster**_  
 _ **This love is taking over**_  
 _ **Take us higher here we go**_  
 _ **Oh, oh, oh**_  
 _ **Welcome to the show**_  
 _ **Gravity we're defying**_  
 _ **'Cause we were made for flying**_  
 _ **We're about to lose control**_  
 _ **Welcome to the show**_

I cease twirling, opting to, instead, make a slow show of pulling the 'blade' from my throat. When it's out, I perform a series of kicks and swirls with the sword, as if combining martial arts and fencing moves in a display of strength and agility.

 _ **Oh, oh, we're on a mission nothing-**_  
 _ **Nothing, can stand in our way**_  
 _ **Oh, oh, we don't need permission**_  
 _ **We're gonna rise up and we'll be the change**_  
 _ **Oh, oh, hear us on your stereo**_  
 _ **Oh, oh, we're about to lose control**_  
 _ **Oh, oh, everybody knows**_  
 _ **Oh, oh, this is where you let go**_

I pull out the small knives and juggle them in one hand, my body spinning a few times before it dips and sways with the music. This... high of performance is new to me. I've always felt at home in the circus, but this feeling of adrenaline and excitement is foreign. I can't say I don't like it, but I can't say it's not bad either. _'But why am I worrying about that? Does it hold some sort of meaning for me?'_

 _ **Hands high like a roller coaster**_  
 _ **This love is taking over**_  
 _ **Take us higher here we go**_  
 _ **Oh, oh, oh**_  
 _ **Welcome to the show**_  
 _ **Gravity we're defying**_  
 _ **'Cause we were made for flying**_  
 _ **We're about to lose control**_  
 _ **Welcome to the show**_

I can feel myself feeding off the suspense and energy of the crowd, who are undoubtedly watching with bated breath. I split, balancing perfectly. The sword is gone and both hands juggle the knives. _'... Why am I here again...?'_

 _ **Put your hands u-u-up,**_  
 _ **We're gonna have some fu-u-u-n.**_  
 _ **We've only just begu-u-u-n,**_  
 _ **And it's too late to ru-u-u-n, you can't run.**_  
 _ **So put 'em u-u-up,**_  
 _ **We're gonna have some fu-u-u-n.**_  
 _ **Turn up the bass let it bu-u-u-mp.**_  
 _ **We've only just begun, and you can't run!**_

I throw the knives down, landing in perfect lines beneath the rope I grin madly as I drop off the rope to swing and turn on it, like one of those gymnastics on the high bar. _'What possessed me to do this?'_

 _ **Hands high like a roller coaster**_  
 _ **This love is taking over**_  
 _ **Take us higher here we go**_  
 _ **Oh, oh, oh**_  
 _ **Welcome to the show!**_  
 _ **Gravity we're defying**_  
 _ **'Cause we were made for flying**_  
 _ **We're about to lose control**_  
 _ **Welcome to the show!**_

I can faintly hear gasps of shock and maybe terror. _'Why am I doing this?'_ That must mean the people and creatures from my mind have finally come out of the shadows, dancing and whatnot on the ground below. _'Is it to impress? Is it for fun? Is it so I don't die?'_

 _ **Hands high like a roller coaster**_  
 _ **This love is taking over**_  
 _ **Take us higher here we go**_  
 _ **Oh, oh, oh**_  
 _ **Welcome to the show**_  
 _ **Gravity we're defying**_  
 _ **'Cause we were made for flying**_  
 _ **We're about to lose control**_  
 _ **Welcome to the show!**_

Something is slowly wrapping around me as the final chorus is sung. I know that they're black tentacles belonging to an impossibly tall, faceless man.

 _ **So put 'em u-u-up,**_  
 _ **We're gonna have some f-u-u-n.**_  
 _ **Turn up the bass let it b-u-u-mp.**_  
 _ **We've only just begun, and you can't run.**_  
 _ **So put 'em u-u-up,**_  
 _ **We're gonna have some f-u-u-n.**_  
 _ **Turn up the bass let it b-u-u-mp.**_  
 _ **We've only just begun,**_  
 _ **And you can't run!**_

At the last words, I am swallowed by the darkness that is the body of Slender Man.

I open my eyes as the roaring of the cheering crowd rushes back at me. I'm standing on one of the platforms. There's three spotlights on me, and my feet and hands ache slightly. What the fuck did I do out there?

 _Twirling, swinging, juggling- suicide for tightrope walkers._

Holy fuck did I really-?!

 _Lost in the energy of the crowd, Creepy Pasta coming to life beneath me. Slender Man enveloping me like his Princess of Horror._

Oh shit... Ceili's going to kill me... again...

I deftly climb down, ignoring the cheers and roses - _fucking really? Roses?_ \- being thrown at me, and follow the Subjugglette back into the changing room. I practically tear the outfit off, despite how lovely it is. I didn't sign up for this when I came to Alternia. I won't do this again.

"Highblood wants you back in the ring, Miracle." the Subjugglette informs me. Miracle? What the fuck kind of name is that? Hell no, I don't wanna go back out there! "Fine." I answer, putting my hair into a ponytail after acquiring my jeans and tee. She leads me back out wordlessly.

The crowd goes wild as I step back into the ring. I keep my face neutral, giving nothing away as I stand facing the Grand Highblood on his dark throne. The audience goes silent as he speaks, "Ladies and Gentlemen, highbloods of every color, I am sure the motherfucking performance tonight was more than motherfucking miraculous." There's a short moment of intense cheering before it goes quiet again.

"You have seen what motherfuckin' miracle the Mirthful Messiahs have sent us. The motherfucking Dark Carnival has spoken. She is now under the motherfucking protection of the Subjugglators," he reaches down and grabs me around the waist delicately, holding me out on his palm like a small pet, "as our Little Miracle." Oh fuck, why does that sound binding? The crowd applauds, some whistling or giving light cheers, but t's more for formality than anything. My eyes frantically search the crowd for Ceili, but the bright lights on her make it damn near impossible. _"Kurloz? Help. Please help me."_ I sign my plea using on the alphabet on my right hand, making the movements pronounce, but slight in movement so as to not attract GHB's attention.

 _ **'I've never felt so alone in my life**_  
 _ **As I drank from a cup which was counting my time.**_  
 _ **There's a poison drop in this cup of man;**_  
 _ **To drink it is to follow the left hand path.'**_

* * *

Song is 'Bless The Child' by Nightwish. Hope you liked!


	3. Chapter 3

**MoThErFuCkIn' EnJoY! :o)**

* * *

"I can't believe this! Franny, do you know how much commotion you've caused in highblood society?!" Ceili scolds me, and I flinch, looking down. Kurloz's comforter (it smells like him from yesterday) is wrapped around me, a steaming mug of tea (smells like chamomile) in my hands. I'm in the den of the Makara hive, my new place of residence apparently, with Kurloz, Ceili, and all of Ceili's friends.

 _"I'm sorry, Ceili."_ I exaggerate 'sorry'. _"I can't control it. I don't realize I've done it until after it's all over and I'm standing on the platform."_ I try to explain, my face pleading for her to understand.

"No, Francis! You've fucked up royally! I mean, the _Grand Highblood?!_ A miracle from the _Mirthful Messiahs?!_ " She's slowly getting more enraged. Kurloz shifts just a bit closer to me, already sitting on my left. Eridan scoots a little closer to her, hopefully to grab her if she charges the elder. "Francis, this was suppose to be a vacation for us- a chance to escape our Earthly lives and be who we want to be for once! But N _OOOOO_ , you had to go ahead and bring your work with you! I'm sick of you fucking up everything!" Ceili's friends flinch with me this time. Many have that shine of pity in their eyes. I hate that look, but what can I do? It's always been like this; me following Ceili's lead, since she can talk, and her taking her frustration out on me because what else can I do? If I lash out, I'm throwing a tantrum caused by the frustration of being mute (fuck that notion). If I give a smart remark, I look like a grouchy female who's world-weary and hates everybody, plus Ceili would slap me, if I made her angry enough. Now if I'm quiet and just take it, then it ends quickly and I can continue on with my miserable life.

"Hey, that's not cool, Kaysis." Gamzee's voice comes from close to my right. Great, both Makaras are at my defense. "How the motherfuck do you think she's up and motherfuckin' feelin' right now? Maybe she's as motherfucking sick and tired of your Earth lives as you motherfuckin' are. Cut her some motherfuckin' slack." I can feel myself blushing. No one's every stood up for me before.

"Whatever." Ceili growls before stomping out loudly. Eridan follows her out. "I'll go talk to her." Aradia speaks up before going after them.

"C'mon Fransis, let's get you to bed." Gamzee suggests carefully. Kurloz nods, standing and offering his hand to me. I place the mug in his hold, much to his confusion. _"I'm sorry."_ I sign with a sad, rueful expression. _"I didn't want this to happen."_ At this, Kurloz shakes his head. **"It's completely fine, Francis. Highblood's insane anyways. I'm sure this'll all blow over in a few days."** he assures me, setting down my cup and gathering me into his arms bridal style. **"You should rest. Messiahs only knows what the Dark Carnival can do you your mind."** I nod slightly as he carries me to my new room. With my ear against his chest, exhaustion washes over me, and I succumb to the lullaby that is the steady beating of Kurloz's heartbeat...

* * *

My eyes flutter open to deep indigo. The sun's coming through the slightly cracked drapes, so I know it's daytime still. _'How long have I slept?'_ I get to my feet and stumble a bit. I grimace as the cool, dark grey flooring awakens my nerves, thus bringing me completely out of my sleepy stupor.

I open a random door to a cooler breeze. It's pitch black inside and I fumble for a light switch. _'Dammit, is this the bathroom?'_ I find the switch and, as quickly as I flip it on, I flip it off. My heart is pounding from the split second it took me to realize where I am.

I'm in one of the Makara's room. I can only tell by the giant recuperacoon I saw briefly on the other side of the room. Slowly, I shuffle backwards and back into my room.

I bump into something- or someone- warm. Arms wrap around me and I'm startled badly. **"Easy, Francis. It's just me."** Kurloz speaks in my mind. I relax almost immediately. I sign quickly. _"I'm so sorry. I was looking for the bathroom and I found myself here."_ I explain, feeling a bit frantic and sheepish.

Wordlessly, he turns to our left to face another door, one that's now open and shows that it is, in fact, the bathroom. _"Thank you."_ I sign, blushing madly and hoping he doesn't see.

A deep, throaty chuckle resonates from him, and he relinquishes me. **"It's okay. Sleep well."** With that, he disappears into his dark room, leaving the door open.

After a quick trip to the bathroom, I crawl back into the uber-huge bed and snuggling into the remnants of warmth, hoping to renew those embers into a comfortable flame.

X~*~*~*~*~X

 _My eyes flutter open and I can only place where I am as... a hospital? I sit up slowly. The edges are a dull gray and fuzzy, so I know this is a dream._

 _One of two red doors opens and a skeleton nurse walks in. "You're up. Good. The Messiahs wish to see you." its disembodied, female voice comes from the cracked and half decayed skull. I shake my head. I don't know who the hell she's talking about, but I'm not meeting anyone! I jump up, yanking with me the rod with my IV bag, and open the other red door. I stop when I see the utter blackness on the other side. Like, there's not eve a floor! "Would you rather die than meet the Messiahs?" The same female voice seems to echo in the blackness. "If you die in your sleep, you die in real life." Two voices- one male and one female- whisper in either of my ears, startling me. I jump automatically, their insane laughter echoing all around me as I as fall gracelessly through the pitch darkness, screaming a shrill, inhuman scream..._

X~*~*~*~*~X

Later that evening, I find myself in the den alone, watching IT and munching on a bowl of all my favorite candies. Ceili's at the castle with Feferi, and none of the Makaras have made an appearance yet.

I throw my head back and laugh silently at a more gruesome scene, wiggling slightly in glee and licking happily at my tootsie pop.

A low, familiar chuckle makes me whip my head to the entryway to see Kurloz, half hidden in the shadows. I scoot up from my reclined position of take up the whole couch and gesture to the spot beside me. He takes my offer with a small smile and takes a Twizzler from the bowl. We just sit like that until the end of the movie, at which point I hop up to put in another one for my scary movie marathon. Am I weird for finding these movies to be relaxing?

Next is Silent Hill, and Kurloz asks me few questions about the story, which I will pause and answer every now and then. _"Humans have a twisted sense of imagination."_ Kurloz signs when it's over. _"Your version of scary and our version of scary are completely different, from what I've seen."_ I give a small, apologetic smile. _"Maybe for the general populous of humans."_ I sign back. _"These things amused and comfort me. I fear humans more than nightmares, or ghosts, or anything these movies can dish up. Here."_ I put in The Houses October Built and sit back down beside him. I'm enraptured in the story, despite having seen it countless times. At some point, I end up cuddled against Kurloz with his arm around me as we watch the poor group of people get picked off one by one.

At the end of it, Kurloz looks down at me and cocks his head slightly. **"There's candy on your mouth."** he informs me as he leans in and a long purple tongue slips out from between his stitches to lick up the sticky substance on the corner of my mouth. I blush furiously. _"Thank you."_ I sign hastily before getting up and changing the movie again. He doesn't try anything like that again for the rest of the night. However, he does disappear for most of A Haunting In Connecticut to return with a hand-made pizza. _'Did he make it?'_ _"It's really good Kurloz. Thank you."_ I sign my compliments, to which he nods humbly.

* * *

At the end of my marathon (I got restless and decided enough was enough), I let Kurloz lead me out of the hive and into town. Looking at the models in the windows of clothing stores, I see that all of the fashions are rather... conservative. I frown, and Kurloz notices my expression. _"Is something wrong?"_ he signs, looking just the slightest bit worried. I shake my head, and he doesn't seem convinced, but doesn't press me further.

Some childish, indignant yelling makes me look over to the fountain in the middle of the square of milling highblood trolls. A couple of blue and purple blooded (if their clothing colors are anything to go by) boys are picking on a small girl in a sage green, simple dress. I watch as they take her little doll and throw it into the fountain, pushing her in too and laughing as they walk away. _'Children can be the cruelest sometimes.'_

While Kurloz is distracted by another highblood, I flit over to the girl and help her out, going so far as to get completely soaked to retrieve her small doll. She hiccups as I hand her the worn thing, and looks up at me with translucent, sage-green tears running down her cheeks. "Who-who a-are y-you?" she stammers through her hiccups. I hold a finger to my lips in a silent gesture before reaching behind her ear and pulling back a beautiful red rose. Her black and yellow eyes go wide with wonder. "How-?" she begins, but I make a show of crumbling up the rose, much to her utter horror. I peek into my cupped hands, as if looking at a secret something, and pull away sharply, as if something wanted my face. The girl gasps and I pretend to notice her, holding out my hands to her. She tucks her doll in the crook of her arm and holds out her hands together. I drop the small bird into her hands gently, and she gasps in awe and wonder.

She looks up at me and I do a slow back flip onto the edge of the fountain, like the flexible freak I am (thank goodness I'm in Capri's and a tee). I act like a ballerina a bit, spinning and bowing before doing slow flips and stretches, performing a small something for this poor child. So with my legs bent backwards, my heels crossed behind my head, I reach over and seem to pull another red rose from one of the streams of water in the fountain. I sniff it, smiling as I hand it to her. Tears seem to spring into her eyes again, on the verge of falling over, when I pull another, and another, and another. I begin to move my body again, dancing slowly as I shower the girl with beautiful red roses. I decide to end my performance with a graceful twirl, showering the now large crowd of onlookers with water- all accept the girl. The I step out of the fountain to stand before her, dripping wet. I kneel in front of her, and grin, letting my right hand touch my heart while my left moves from behind me to offer the girl a solid gold rose. She gasps again, and tears stream down her face as she accepts my gifts and hugs me tightly, wet clothes be damned. She is then taken away by a protective young male in an emerald green, who thanks me before ushering the girl and her gifts along. She waves excitedly to me until I can no longer see her in the crowd.

I sense a familiar presence beside me- Kurloz. I turn and smile apologetically to him. "Sorry about the mess." I sign, only feeling the slightest bit sheepish for my actions. Kurloz chuckles and shakes his head. "We need to get you into dry clothes." is all he signs before taking my hand and dragging me off to the boutiques... Ugh.

After an hour or so of differing opinions, we leave that section of the stores with Kurloz carrying six bags of clothes he got me. _'Is he trying to spoil me or something?!'_ He wouldn't even let me carry anything! Not to mention I'm now walking around in an indigo, Victorian style, Gothic lolita dress, complete with a frilly headband, knee socks, and Mary Janes.

We return to the Makara Hive to find GHB waiting for us. He looks us over, Kurloz's face impassive while mine is a bit on the defiant side. He smirks a bit. "Been look fer ya fer motherfuckin' hours, lil' miracle." he rumbles. Is he talking to me? "See how yer motherfuckin' think pan is doing after your motherfuckin' performance."

I decide to tease him with a bit of truth. **"Actually, I had a strange dream last night."** I sign, Kurloz translating and projecting to both me and GHB. **"I dreamed I was in a hospital and a dead nurse came in, saying something about meeting the Messiahs."** I shrug, pretending to be oblivious to both their incredulous stares. **"But, of course, it could only have been a dream. I am human after all. Perhaps my feeble mind is too weak to withstand, or even accept the presence of Alternian gods?"** I shrug again, gingerly picking up the bags Kurloz had dropped in his shock before disappearing upstairs to my room where I look over the clothes we got. I only knew of about a third of everything he'd bought. I frown as I realize they're all dresses! There are three more dresses like the one I'm wearing now that are in varying shades of dark purple. There's a few simple black or dark purple sun dresses, some heels, tights, knee-high stockings, and some make-up. But the content of the final two dress bags give me an eye twitch.

The first is like a prom dress- an A-line torso with a column skirt the sort of flares out a bit. The skirt is in four layers; silk, heavy chiffon, thick tulle, and lighter tulle respectively from the inside out. The torso is littered with sparkling crystals and is very stunning, but I don't particularly like the sweetheart neckline and lack of straps or something to add to the bareness of my shoulders. The other dress is a one shoulder, floor-length black gown of the sophisticated variety. _'Are they expecting me to go to some sort of formal event?!'_ I bare my teeth in a silent snarl at the column that is the skirt. _'Looks like I have tailoring to do.'_


	4. Chapter 4

**HoNk HoNk HoNk! :o)**

 **A.N.: I realized I forgot to make Kurloz curse in the last chapter. I'll try to make sure I don't forget again! SoRrY! :o|**

* * *

Six months pass by in a blink of my eyes. Kurloz has taken to teaching me bout Alternian and Beforian history and culture when we're not out together, or watching movies, or doing other fun things to kill time. And in all this time, I haven't once seen or heard from the Grand Highblood.

I'm currently teaching teaching Kurloz how to roller skate. His friends are with us in this park as well. Latula and Mituna are skateboarding on the ramps, Kankri, Damara, and Porrim are sitting under a tree reading and talking quietly amongst each other, Meulin is refereeing Horuss's and Rufioh's... I don't know exactly what they're doing, but it seems fun enough for them. Meenah is trying to get Aranea to put down her own book as they sit on a park bench a few feet away, and Cronus is across the park, flirting with some ladies... again...

I clap as Kurloz finally gets the hang of it, skating around our little cement area on his own. He gives a small smile, and frowns are he tries to remember how to stop. _'No- Kurloz- wait-!'_ I think to him hurriedly as he tries to move onto his toes, where the stopper thingy is. He fails, of course, and ends up face-planted in the grass.

 _'Are you alright?'_ I ask mentally as I quickly skate over to him. "Kurloz!" I hear Mituna yell in worry from the ramps. I hold a thumbs up to keep the psiioniic calm. I step into the grass carefully and kneel beside him, helping him turn over so he can grimace and wipe his face of the grass and dirt. I snort (it's an air noise, not vocal) and move to release his feet of the skates. _"Maybe giving you the singles first was a bad idea."_ I sign to him as he sits up. _"No, it was motherfucking fine. I thoroughly up and motherfucking enjoyed it while it motherfucking lasted."_ he signs back, to which I throw my head back and laugh silently. I don't think I've laughed as much as I have since getting here than I have ever!

"Highblood!" Kurloz and I both share a small frown before his face becomes impassive and he turns to see five highbloods who's shirts are purple hues that are more blue than indigo. They incline their heads to him respectfully. I put my eyes to the ground, rolling back the equivalent of a few steps. Kurloz makes a subtle reach for me, but I flinch away from the touch. He turns his attention to the highbloods who don't so much as acknowledge that I'm here. "Highblood, we have been sent to give you this." I watch out of my periphial as one of them hands Kurloz a parchment-colored envelope. One leers at me suggestively, and I skate back a few more feet so that I'm beside Meenah and Aranea. "P-Princess!" the one staring at me stammers, kneeling hastily. The other highbloods do so as well, all exclaiming "Princess!" pretty loudly. I hastily take off my skates while Meenah scoffs. "Wave-ever. If you're done giving the Juggalo his invite, then scram." They scramble to leave, but not until after the one that was leering at me gives me one more suggestive look.

"Idiots." Meenah grumbles, Kurloz nodding in agreement before he wraps his arms around my waist and pulls me to him. **"Don't motherfuckin' do that again."** he speaks in my mind. _'Do what?'_ I inquire mentally. **"Don't up and leave my motherfuckin' side again. You are an equal to one of my motherfuckin' status. If they harm you, I will personally repaint your motherfuckin' walls in their motherfuckin' blood. 'Kay?"** I nod sheepishly. Someone's a bit adorabloodthirsty.

"Okay, barf. Sea-riously Makara, just tell the world she's your Matesprit already." It's sarcastic, but I blush nonetheless. I don't know if she thinks we're Matesprits or not, but Kurloz hasn't even mentioned such things. Probably the most couple-y thing we ever do is when he licks stray food from my lips. Yeah, that's pretty... couple-y... Oh gosh...

I pull away gently, signing that I'm going to the restroom and wander off after leaving him in charge of the skates. In the stall, I cover my face with my hands. Could Kurloz and I really be together? He's a Subjugglator- GHB's heir! Isn't he expected to be with a Subjugglette? What if he just wants to be friends? No, he already has Meulin as a Moirail. Is this just how Kurloz acts? He's pretty reserved around everyone save Meulin and I... Why me?

Resisting the urge to cry, I leave the bathroom only to see the highblood who was leering t me earlier waiting outside. He smirks at me and I blink a few times before stepping back into the bathroom, hiding in the first stall and locking it before crawling under each one and locking them and stopping in the third stall of five. _'Why hasn't he come in yet?'_

And then the bathroom door opens slowly, and I hear a set of calm footsteps. My heart begins to beat frantically. _'Kurloz? Kurloz, can you hear me? Help! Help me Kurloz!'_ I cry out in my head. There's no answer.

"Now now, Human. There's no fun in hide-and-seek. Come on out and we'll get you back to 'your friends'." he chuckles. His footsteps slowly get closer, and the adrenaline begins to flow, increase my heart speed. I try with all my might to keep my breathing even. "Why don't we start off with introductions? My name's Alorst. Whats yours?" Heat pricks behind my eyes as they scan for any- _any_ \- means of escape. He's an inch or so tall than Horuss, and I can see his oddly shaped horns just barely over the tall stall walls.

He kicks in the first door forcefully. I jump, from my seat on the back of the toilet, and swallow thickly. Tears begin to run down my face. He kicks in the second one and I let out one silent sob. For once, I'm thankful for my silence. _'K-Kurloz...'_

The third stall door flies open and Alorst gives a dark smirk. "There you are, beautiful. You know, playing hard-to-get makes me... hot." He proceeds to take off his overcoat and shirt. I look at the convenient wall. 'Kurloz, help! Please help me! Can you hear me?' One of his huge hands wraps around my neck and I instinctively grab his wrist with my own hands. My wide lilac eyes beg him to not do this as his other hand shreds my clothes. Tears flow freely, and I shake my head as best as I can, mouthing, "No!" over and over. My soon-to-be-rapist only laughs darkly as he unbuttons his jeans...

 ** _~ Le Skip cuz I have a weak stomach ~_**

Kurloz didn't come until after everything was said and done. He found me there on the bathroom floor: naked, half-alive, covered in bruises and scratches, and lying in a pool of disgusting genetic material. Half the group is with him. Kankri gasps in horror and runs off, and Cronus offers his jacket to Kurloz before going after his Matesprit. Kurloz gingerly wraps me in the leather that smells faintly of tobacco and the ocean.

"Who the glub who do this?!" demands Meenah angrily. I look up at her, and she flinches when she sees me eyes. She must see the brokenness and resignation in them. I think my reply to Kurloz, who sets his jaw and relays my answer. **"Many would, Heiress. That is the motherfuckin' society in which you up and motherfuckin' live. This is what you will motherfuckin' inherit, after all."** Meenah's enraged face tells me that she was the only one to hear it. Porrim hurries over with the blanket her, Kankri, and Damara had been laying on earlier. "Kurloz, we need to get her to a hospital." Kurloz nods and picks up little burrito me. I let him do as he pleases, my mind and body numb as a coping mechanism for the trauma. I manage to come out of it long enough to think to him, _'Please don't tell Ceili.'_ Kurloz nods and continues walking with all our friends gathered around us (save Kankri and Cronus, of course).

At the hospital the doctors tell Kurloz and Meenah that I'm just in a state of shock, and that I should be better in a few days to a week at most. I have a ripped 'nook' opening, as they call it, and a few fractured bones. My bruises will be healed in a few weeks, and they are currently running DNA samples of my assailant. That, and the name I provided for them with a hint of terror. They have a match not five minutes later; Alorst Vichil, a highblood who's lower than Kurloz, but higher than Horuss. He has a reputation for being... 'rough' with lowbloods, as the doctor puts it, saying that they get at least two lowbloods in here a week from him. Meenah looks like she could boil water, and Kurloz's dark, murderous aura is actually comforting.

Porrim takes me home with her, where she, Meulin, and Damara clean me up and make sure I'm comfortable on a pile of soft blankets and squishy pillows. I'm given a cup of hot tea and the girls talk amongst themselves quietly. I don't bother listening to them, preferring to immerse myself into my own thoughts. I can't believe... I'd never imagined that something like this would happen to me... It feels kinda like a dream... the reality hasn't set in yet... What does Kurloz think now? Does he think I'm weak, so now he doesn't want me? He dumps pathetic little me on poor Porrim, who probably has more important things to attend to than looking after a broken, used, and rejected human.

"Francis, are you alright?" Porrim's question pulls me from my thoughts as Meulin gently wipes my face with a kerchief. I was crying? _"I'm sorry."_ I sign shakily to her. _"It's okay. No one blames you."_ Meulin signs back, her face kind and understanding. I shake my head, signing hastily and admittedly sloppily, _"No, you should! I'm human! I'm weak! He took advantage of me so easily! I'm nothing! You don't understand-!"_ Meulin grabs my hands, stopping my crazy, frantic movements. Tears are flowing again, and her warm hands break me. She pulls me to her as I sob silently into her shoulder. She emits a soft purr, Damara and Porrim coming to sit near and purr as well. They soothe me and gradually, my sobs cease into hiccups. I pull away slightly to rub my face.

"Where is Kurloz anyway?" Porrim inquires to Meulin. "Oh! He probably went to go hunt down that Vichil character!" She replies loudly- really loudly. Then she looks down at me. "I bet he's gonna paint your walls for you! It was kinda gross the first time he did that for me, but I bet you'll blush!" I frown, my face scrunching together. _"Why would he do that for me? After everything today? Why?"_ I ask, tears beginning to spill again. _"Because he genuinely feels red for you, Francis."_ Meulin signs with a gentle, kind look. _"This has only made him realize that he can't keep beating around the bush with your ridiculous human 'courtship'."_ she chuckles a bit. _"He'll have ask you to be his Matesprit soon, or other highbloods will be after you, whether they know you to be a Subjugglette or no."_ she explains. I frown a little deeper. _"I'm a human. I can't be a Subjugglette."_ I object, frown still in place. Meulin giggles. _"Didn't you hear Highblood? You, in Alternian society, are the same rank as a Subjugglette now. To harm you is to harm one of the Subjugglators, and they won't take too kindly to one of their own being hurt. They're very... I guess I should say tight-knit?"_ It's a little heart-lightening to see her struggle to sign words she obviously doesn't use very often.

Dolorosa and Kanaya choose this moment to answer. "What happened?" Dolorosa demands. And as if to answer her, there's a knock at the door. Kanaya answers it, and Meenah, Latula, Mituna, and Aranea appear, following Kanaya back into the living room where we are. They immediately join us on the pile of blankets and pillows. For some reason, their silent support makes my heart hurt less, but I really wish Kurloz was here to hold me. Porrim rises, and takes the other two jade bloods into a different room, probably to quietly explain what happened. I appreciate her attempt to not bring it up around me, but it makes me feel more like a problem than a person. But I don't say anything- I only close my eyes, relaxing a bit in Damara's hold, and carefully piece together my heart and soul, welding wrought iron to weld and leather to sew them back together. Kinda depressing, but my fragile self needs something sturdy... like Kurloz's presence...

I swallow, my throat becoming tight, as I fight to keep tears from falling behind my hot, closed eyelids. _'Kurloz...'_

 **"Yes?"**

My eyes fly open at the sound of him in my head. Damara cocks her head at me, but I don't answer her questioning look. _'Kurloz? You can hear me now?'_

 **"Yes."** he sounds a bit bitter. **"On the way to the motherfuckin' hospital, I strengthened our mental motherfuckin' connection. There's nowhere in the motherfuckin' universe you could motherfuckin' be that I can't motherfuckin' hear you now."** he explains. **"Francis, I'm so motherfuckin' sorry I couldn't motherfuckin' get to you in motherfuckin' time. I... there is no motherfuckin' excuse for me not up and sending a motherfucker with you, or just escorting you my motherfuckin' self. I should have known motherfuckin' better than to think that you, as a human, would be up and safe here on a planet where your very motherfuckin' _blood color_ is despised."** He sounds like he's beating himself up. _'No, Kurloz, it's not your fault. I should have been on guard- more aware.'_ This isn't his fault, and he shouldn't feel bad for something I brought upon myself.

 **"No, Francis."** There's a knock at the door and Porrim goes to answer it. **"If you think this is your motherfuckin' fault, than you're motherfuckin' wrong, lil' mama."** Porrim returns with Kurloz, who probably doesn't know he has a few flecks of blue-purple blood here and there. He takes Dolorosa's place of cradling me in his arms. "So how'd it go, Kurloz?" Meulin inquires loudly again. Kurloz gives a small smile and a thumbs-up, his other hand petting my hair. It's so much better than the hair-pulling that Alorst gave me. My scalp is still sore, and I'm pretty sure he pulled out at least half of my hair. Is violent sex a part of Alternian genes? If so, then I'm a little afraid of being with Kurloz. He's a Makara, after all; they're suppose to be the most unstable and violent of the troll race. Meulin giggles and claps excitedly. What did he tell her?

"Makara, will the human be staying here, or will she be returning with you?" Dolorosa inquires calmly, the main motherly presence of the room. Kurloz looks at me. **"Do you want to motherfuckin' go home, Francis?"** he inquires mentally. I think about it. I feel secure with Kurloz here. But there's an unexplainable comfort I get from being around other females. _'Not really... but I'd hate to be a bother to them. Just pick what's easier for everyone, yeah?'_ I close my eyes, not really wanting to deal with reality anymore. Before I can register anything else, I fall into an uneasy sleep...

* * *

 **A.N.: Yeah, so, I really don't know WHAT I was thinking when I typed this. It's 1:27 here, so I think I'm gonna post this and probably regret it in the morning. :P HoNk!**


	5. Chapter 5

**MoThErFuCkIn' EnJoY! :o)** _OCXKurloz of the Alpha Series. OWNS NOTHING!_

* * *

"Francis!" I flinch at Ceili's cry of relief as the front door bursts open to reveal her and the rest of her friends. Kurloz, Gamzee, and I had been huddled on the couch, watching White Noise. The sound of several hurrying feet drowns out the movie that Kurloz thankfully pauses and then Ceili's throwing herself at me. "Oh, Francis, why didn't you tell me what'd happened!? Do you know how I felt when Kanaya told me?" She sounds pissed, but also sad. She moves to hug me and I flinch away without thinking. It doesn't deter her, but Kurloz pulling me to him does. Did I mention my walls were covered big, purple-blue hearts when Kurloz brought me home?

Ceili stops and pouts a bit. She's not a small child anymore, though, so her 'I can get away with it because I'm cute' factor doesn't work. "You should have told me. I don't want you to steep here in depressing thoughts." she speaks softly. Eridan takes a step forward to stand beside her, though she doesn't give any indication that she cares about the action. Then Eridan speaks; "I, erm, heard that the lower blood has been... taken care of." he looks pointedly at Kurloz and Gamzee, the latter grinning wildly and the former giving a dark smile.

She doesn't stay long, because I refuse to tell her anything, and Kurloz respects my wishes and doesn't say anything either. I know she feels bad for ignoring me, but I just don't feel that we're close enough anymore for me to tell her about my... ordeal. Feferi, Kanaya, Sollux, Karkat, Nepeta, and Equius stay for a while longer, Feferi assuring me that she and Meenah are working on changing Alternian laws with the help of Terezi, Latula, and Redglare before they, too, leave. All save Karkat, who ends up on the large couch with us. His Matesprit, a human boy by the name of Dave, and his three friends who are also humans arrive to join my horror fest with me. Kurloz even goes so far as to have four more humans my own age come over as well. _'Why are they here, Kurloz? Is something going on?'_ I inquire mentally as the Juggalo sits back on the couch on my right. **"Figured you could use a little more motherfucking 'human', lil' mama."** he replies simply, shrugging. **"Plus, the motherfuckers wanted to up and meet you. They... know about what motherfukcin' happened, but only that it up and happened- no motherfuckin' details have been shared. I figured you'd up and tell a motherfucker if you felt motherfuckin' comfortable with it."** I nod once, smiling a small smile. _'Thank you, Kurloz. You're too good to me.'_ He doesn't answer, but his vibe goes from the 'best boyfriend ever' to 'guilty boyfriend trying to make her happy and hide something'.

... Wait, we're not even together!

Roxy, Jake, Jade, John, and Rose click with me quickly. Dirk and Karkat's Matesprit Dave get the 'buddy' vibe a movie later, while Jane is a bit wary of the entire gathering. Or, well, the theme of the gathering. She doesn't take too kindly to horror movies.

She jolts a bit when I lay my hand on her shoulder lightly. She looks at me with wide, startled eyes. "Oh, it's just you." she exhales in relief. _"Are the movies bothering you?"_ I sign slowly for her. Her brows knit together in concentration. My face becomes a bit sad, despite my best efforts. So, she doesn't know sign language. Pity; she looked like a smart cookie who would. "I'm terribly sorry, my signing is a bit rusty. Could you repeat that a bit slower?" she asks quietly, so as to not disturb everyone else watching the movie. I repeat my question, a bit slower. My heart feels warm and light with the knowledge that someone else knows sign language. OMGYAY!

When the other humans decide to have a sleepover, I'm immediately given domain of the girls, who usher me to my room. _'How did they know it was here?'_

Jane is my translator as we huddle together and just... talk. I've never done something like this before, so I'm a little giddy. Ceili had talked about going to sleepovers, and how they were boring, but now I think she just said those things so that I'd feel better about not being able to go.

Jade takes to painting my nails, while Jane does Roxy's. Rose files her own perfect black ones. "So we've been informed that you are considered a Subjugglator in Alternian society, Francis." she begins casually. I nod, blushing lightly. "I heard Kurloz can't claim you as a Matesprit because of his vow." Jane speaks softly. "It must be tough on your relationship." she murmurs sympathetically. I blink rapidly, my eyes widening. My look of utter bewilderment must have given away my lack of such knowledge, because she immediately is sheepish. "I-I'm really sorry! I-I thought... you knew..." she finishes lamely. I don't let Jade finish my nails, opting to, instead, storm out of the room to hunt for a certain mute Makara.

My prey is in the den with the rest of the guys, whom are playing Halo 4. I stop in front of Kurloz, arms crossed. He looks up from his book to give me a questioning face. The other guys pause their game, a bit nervous from my dark aura.

I quickly begin to sign, my anger and frustration clear on my face. _"What the fuck did I just hear from **Jane** of all people?! You've been holding back your Matesprit proposal? Is it because I'm mute and you don't want to be with a mute? Are you not allowed to be with a mute? Or is it because I'm human? Kurloz, you had better explain yourself and explain it good, or I'm going to rip you a new one!"_ His 'deer-in-the-headlights' look would have been hilariously priceless if it weren't for the situation. He stands slowly, hands up and palms to me, as if to placate my anger. **"Francis, please hear a motherfucker out."** I raise an eyebrow that blatantly says that that's not gonna happen. **"I didn't want to up and tell you to save you the motherfuckin' drama of... well, of my motherfuckin' red feelings towards you, lil' mama."**

And there's the pitch. Shit, that threw me for a loop. All those advances- the flirting, the licking, the cuddling, the compliments- he meant them all? I'm not just a sideshow freak to him? I blink up at him, tears beginning to fill my eyes. **"The Mirthful Messiahs said I couldn't up and motherfuckin' have you unless I broke of my motherfuckin' vow of silence. But to break a motherfucking vow means death. I'd rather up and have you around and live than motherfuckin' love you once and then leave you motherfuckin' heart broken."** He looks sad. **"Aw, don't up and cry, Lil' Mama. No need to be motherfuckin' upset over a one-sided flush crush."** I touch my cheeks to feel that I am, indeed, crying.

"Dude, what'd you say to her?" Dave asks boredly. John floats up and near me, reaching to place a hand on my shoulder, but I move away. I glare at Kurloz, who looks away sadly, before taking advantage of his bent position. He's so much taller, so he bends down to talk to me, once claiming it's so we can look each other in the eyes. I grab one of his horns and begin to haul him away in his state of shock and surprise. A couple of the boys behind us snicker, but my glare quickly fixes them. Well, save the Striders, but they'll soon learn my wrath if I figure out that they had anything to do with this.

I lead the ridiculous Makara through the halls and into a randomly vacant bedroom, shoving him in before shutting and locking the door. _"Sit."_ I sign, my face telling him that I'm not taking no for an answer. He slowly sits on the bed, his eyes showing confusion while his face shows what would be shame, if a Makara was capable of such a look.

 _"Why would you keep this from me?"_ My face transforms into one of hurt, and he flinches just the slightest bit. **"Lil' Mama-"** I mentally push him out of my mind. _"No. You don't get to talk until I'm done."_ I sign furiously, tears beginning to spill over. Kurloz nods his agreement. I take a deep breath to calm myself. _"I can understand if you aren't allowed to be with me, Kurloz. You could have just told me that. I get that human-Alternian relationships are frowned upon. Especially highbloods."_ I pause for a moment. _"I know how important a vow is, and how to die keeping one. But that doesn't mean you have to keep the other party in the dark. I had to hear this from a girl I just met **tonight** , for crying out loud!"_ He flinches again, but I don't stop for him. _"Kurloz, I love you more than I've ever loved anything in my pathetic, miserable life. I would have understood."_ I bite my lower lip, fighting the sobs. _"You said you had red feelings for me. If you really felt that way, you would have been comfortable telling me."_ My hands drop. _'Is there anything you have to say?'_ I think to him sadly, my tears nonstop by now.

 **"Lil' Mama, I've died inside every motherfuckin' day because I didn't want to tell you."** His voice comes to my mind as he stands as slowly as he sat. **"I don't wanna up and leave you the motherfuck alone on this planet because I was selfish enough to take what I want and die."** His hands comes up to cup my face, forcing me to look up at him. **"I love you more than you can imagine, Lil' Mama. I'm not letting a vow keep us apart. That's why,"** he reaches up to his mouth with his left hand and carefully cuts the stitches with his claws, pulling out the loose threads and looking down at me with a smile, "I wanted to say I love you, and will only speak for you, as the Mirthful Messiahs have instructed." Oh my god, his voice is probably the most sexiest fucking thing I've ever heard! It's deep, and rich, and growl-y, and a little rusty- but that's probably from not speaking in so long. Tears begin to flow anew, and he pulls me to him in a hug. I cling to him like a lifeline, and sob silently into the crook of his neck and he hums softly to me. I recognize the song.

 _If I had a box just for wishes,_  
 _And dreams that had never come true,_  
 _The box would be empty except for the memory_  
 _Of how they were answered by you._

 _But there never seems to be enough time_  
 _To do the things you want to do once you find them._  
 _I've looked around enough to know_  
 _That you're the one I want to go through time with._

Gently, he pulls my head back from our embrace and his warm, slightly rough lips meet mine. I yield to him without hesitance, my lips parting and our tongues clash with passion. My hand reach up, tangling in his messy black hair as his own hands pull me tight against him. He lifts me up, and I wrap my legs around his waist. I roll my hips down onto him and he lets out a low, guttural groan. He moves back until he's sitting on the bed again and I straddle him. We waste no time- his hands literally ripping my shirt off and me grabbing the base of his horns roughly. He moans a bit into my mouth, and squeezes my ass. I would have moaned too, if I had been capable of such a feat. And despite the violation of my body two weeks ago, I am more than willing to 'pail' with Kurloz right now.

Nimble fingers unclasp my bra and are instantly twisting and pinching my nipples into pertness. I release his lips to breathe, and he trails to my neck, kissing, licking, and biting at the tender flesh in the crook there. It shouldn't turn me on even more, but it does. A weak spot.

My hands wander to his shorts and I feel him chuckle, the sound vibrating through his body and transferring to mine in delicious places. I can feel his bulge writhing furiously against the fabric of his clothing, desperate to get free. I reach around, guiding it out and allowing the slick appendage to wrap around my wrist and fingers. Kurloz moans my name like a prayer for water after a hike through a desert. He nibbles on my ear lobe and I turn my head to the side, shivering as he slips my panties down my legs. He twists, and my back is pressing into the soft sheets. He pulls my undies off completely, and wastes no time pulling off his own garments.

I look down at him and blush slightly. He's definitely bigger than Alorst. I bite my lower lip. _'Will it fit?'_ I ask him hesitantly.

He lets out a full, sexy laugh and caresses my face gently. "I'll make motherfuckin' sure of it. It won't hurt any more than humanly necessary, if at motherfuckin' all." he murmurs to me. I search his eyes for a moment before nodding for him to continue. With my consent, he lowers his head. _'Kurloz, what are you-!'_ I gasp, but it sounds only like a sharp intake of breath. His tongue is lapping playfully at my folds. My mind flashes back to when his tongue had slipped from between his stitched lips to lick my cheek. I'm brought back to the present, however, when the appendage in question slides inside me. I open my mouth in a wordless cry. His incredibly long tongue twists and curls inside me, brushing against something that makes me, unbiddenly, buck my hips. My face is on fire, my breaths coming out in heavy pants, but Kurloz does nothing to stop me from practically riding his face, as lewd as that is. In fact, he encourages it, sticking a finger inside me to aid in the stretching while his tongue abuses that spot inside me that makes me see stars.

The pressure in my stomach is winding tighter. _'Nononono.'_ I try to push Kurloz away, pressing my hands against his mass of hair. _'Kurloz, no. No, I'm going to-'_ The thread inside suddenly snaps and I give a wordless cry as pleasure floods over me in a white, delicious heat. Kurloz's tongue keeps moving, though. And when the haze in my brain begins fading, I realize he managed to work in three more fingers. I can only moan- a small vibrating in my throat- and take this onslaught of new feelings head-on. My body is relaxed and that's when Kurloz pulls away.

His bulge writhes against my folds. "Tell me if you want to stop." Kurloz murmurs gently in my ear before nibbling on the lobe. I squeeze my hands on his biceps, telling him that he can continue. His promise to stop if I need to fills me with an unspeakable love for this crazy juggalo.

I bite my lip as he slips in. It's not much of a stretch from everything before now, but there's a semi-pleasant, sorta uncomfortable burn. Kurloz, thankfully, remains still as I adjust, clenching and releasing a few times to get use to it.

"Motherfuck, Lil' Mama." Kurloz gasps, as if I've done something. I look at him inquisitively. _'What happened?'_

"Fuck. Nothing. It's motherfuckin' nothing." he kisses me chastely. "Just tell me when you're up and motherfuckin' ready, Wicked Mama." he assures me. I take a moment to think about it; the burn is gone, and I'm beginning to feel a tad awkward. I gently tug on his shoulders, licking his lips before kissing him sweetly in an obvious sign to move.

He does- slowly at first- with feather-light kisses on my face. It feels odd, but the stretch is something I crave instinctually. I give a silent whimper, wishing with all of my being, for the first time in my life, that I could speak to Kurloz. Seeming to sense my distress, he brings his mouth to mine hungrily.

It gradually begins to feel better, his bulge writhing inside of me as he continues the steady, slow pace. _'Please. Faster.'_ I plead to him in my mind, rolling my hips up to meet him and he brushes something inside me that immediately has my mind going; _'HarderfasterpleasepleaseNOW.'_

Kurloz reacts immediately, slamming into me faster than I could register. My back arches as his squirming bulge hits everywhere at once. _'Yes! Kurloz!'_ My mind cries as my fingers tangle in the hair at the base of his horns. Kurloz growls, both of us already slick with sweat as he proceeds to pound into me. "Motherfuck." he groans.

I slide my hands to grip the base of his horns again and he leans down to leave hickies on my neck, mouth and tongue hot on my already heated skin. I find myself needing something to bite as well, but the closest the is-

"Fuck!" Kurloz shouts, yanking his head away from me to throw it back in ecstasy as a coolness floods my center. I clench around him, not wanting him to leave me.

But his bulge doesn't cease it's movement- he's still hard. Indigo eyes glow eerily before Kurloz rams into me seemingly with a vengeance. I give another silently cry, eyes screwing shut tightly against the onslaught of pleasure. His grip on my hips will definitely leave bruises.

"That wasn't motherfucking fair, Lil' Mama." Kurloz growls next to my ear- when did he move? Right; eyes closed. I open my eyes to see hair in my face as he buries his face in my shoulder, biting down hard- like, I can feel the blood flowing from the wound- as he ruthlessly fucks me into the mattress. His mouth covers mine intensely.

But it does the trick, and and I'm that much closer to release. I wriggle against him, trying to tell him what I want- what I need. _'Please! Almost-!'_ One of his hands trails down to rub my clit harshly and tears come to my eyes at the pleasure overload. "That's it, Lil' Mama. Come undone." he murmurs huskily in my ear. "Mine." he growls possessively, kissing me roughly again. I moan silently, meeting each of his brutal thrusts with my own movement. "Come for me, Wicked Mama." He leans down and captures one of my nipples in his mouth, rolling the nub around with his tongue. The sensory is to much. _'Kurloz!'_ I scream and unintentionally mouth as my orgasm crashes down on me. I clench around Kurloz, and he groans my name as he stills, that coolness flooding me once more.

As the haze leaves my mind, I feel Kurloz gingerly pull out of me. He pulls me on top of him- one of my favorite napping spots. One of his arms is wrapped securely around my waist and my head rests just over his frantically thudding heart.

"Motherfuck, Wicked Mama." Kurloz murmurs, making me giggle tiredly. _'I love you, Kurloz.'_ I whisper in my mind, slightly afraid he's going to laugh and ignore my claim.

A deep chuckle reverberates in his chest, rattling my head a bit. "I'm flushed for you too, Francis." he whispers softly into my hair. My heart swells with happiness and I nuzzle his chest before being lulled to sleep by his heart beat and a song in my head.

 _Got a secret,  
Can you keep it?  
Swear this one you'll save.  
Better lock it  
In you're pocket-  
Takin' this one to the grave.  
If I show you,  
Then I know you  
Won't tell what I said.  
'Cause two can keep a secret,  
If one of them is dead..._


End file.
